My Love

This is a letter to that girl in my dreams....that girl who is part of me

This is just another letter to you…one of the thousands I write in my mind to send you right from the day I started feeling you as mine…different in one thing that this you are going to read..
Any relationship has to mature..Ours started so wonderfully, just like the blossoming of a flower. I have had my own fantasies, worries, doubts, anxieties about this relationship which, right from the beginning, I thought is going to be one of the most important things in my life.
I always loved to be with you. I sincerely yearned for it. But I had my doubts. I thought it is all one sided.. it is all ‘coz I m forcing you and you don’t want to make me feel bad. Many times I had this thought .
Eveytime you behaved well with me, I grew more guilty of not having done anything to keep you with me.. the same guilt kills me now too when I talk to you..
I never had intentions initially to be physically close to you…as days went on… I could not think of anything except you.. I started having the feeling.. it grew really really intense at one point of time..i began forgetting all other things… but when you were near me.. I just thought to have you with me for more time and nothing else. But till now I feel bad. I can never think of anyone else, Dear.
Though I feel getting physically closer does not mean anything or it is not necessary to be really close by heart, I love to be with you and I have no shame in telling this…if not now any time in this lifetime or next…you would be looking a Queen to me when you grow 75 or 80…
Nowadays, I really try to take away your thought from my heart but just as I try to do it, the thought pulls back its seat in my heart with double vigour..how to avoid thinking about you?
When I talk to you, either I should not feel guilty or I should not talk to you.. temme how not to feel guilty while talkin to you..’coz I hate the other option.
This is my version of the story..Was it just admiration and respect or something more on me..ask yourself and tell me..I hope you are getting along well there…I want you to be happy as ever..Take m y wish if you have ever thought I am important to you..Now that there is no need of hide and seek, you can tell me what all you really felt..I want you to be my best friend if not the best half..